Normally when I write articles I am in a good space .............but not today! So what a great opportunity to practice what I preach! First things first Identify what the specific difficulty is (what happened). So now you have identified the cause of the problem actually FEEL and notice how it makes you feel, rather than shove it down or ignore it. It helps me to write down simple words, so in my case today I am feeling, frustrated, angry, disappointed, confused and upset. Just a few words describing how You ACTUALLY feel. Second stage Ok, now I have felt that feeling, it's important to look at what can I do about it. Are there any actions I need to take or is the situation out of my control? Well for me today, it really is out of my control. I have done as much as I can do (sitting and thinking about the problem just makes me feel worse). If there are any actions that need to be taken (write them down) start with the next right thing and slowly work through them. In my case its to write this article then continue my job list (which always helps me to feel better when I have ticked stuff off). Third stage How important is it anyway? Sometimes I spend time worrying about stuff that is not really that important. Look at what REALLY is important .....health, well being, family, a roof over my head, some food and water if I need it and so on. Lastly, go for a walk in nature get some fresh air, look at what you can be grateful for (my three sons have left home, yippee, it stays tidy all the time) do a kind deed for someone (I just made my husbands lunchbox) put some nice music on, ring a friend (a problem shared is a problem halved). I spoke with a lady just now who's husband recently died after 50 years of marriage (that really puts it in perspective as I still have my husband). Also be kind to yourself, we are all great at beating ourselves up so imagine you where saying something encouraging to yourself which will make you smile. (In my case I am saying, well done Sandra you have written an article which might help someone else feel better today). I have to say I do feel a lot better now so shall go and have a well earned lunch break!

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